"Away from home our fans are fantastic, I'd call them the hardcore fans. 
But at home they have a few drinks and probably the prawn sandwiches, and they
don't realise what's going on out on the pitch." Roy Keane
"We have people coming here to admire the scenery and enjoy their crisps."
Sir Alex Ferguson on Manchester United fans
"People say footballers have terrible taste in music but I would dispute
that. In the car at the moment I've got The Corrs, Cher, Phil Collins,
Shania Twain and Rod Stewart." Andy Gray
"I hate to admit this but I don't even know how to make a cup of tea or
coffee. I can boil a kettle for a pot noodle and I've been known to warm up
some food in the microwave." Michael Owen
"I would like to have Brooklyn christened but I'm not sure which religion
yet." David Beckham
"For Burnley to win they are going to have to score." Chris Kamara
"He will be called Ronald, because we like going to McDonald's." Ronaldo on
his baby
"It is necessary to wear the sandals of humility and not let the win over
Manchester United go to our heads." Vasco Da Gama coach Antonio Lopes
"Young Gareth Barry, y'know, he's young." Kevin Keegan
"Red blood flows through Dyke's veins." Mihir Bose of the Daily Telegraph,
describing the extent of the BBC director general's devotion to ManYoo
"Very few of us have any idea whatsoever of what life is like living in a
goldfish bowl - except, of course, for those of us who are goldfish." 
Graham
Taylor
"Bryan Robson has been a victim of his own success." Middlesbrough chief
executive Keith Lamb
"This is deja vu all over again." Sky Sports Spanish football commentator
"Ken Bates is a football cretin." Martin O'Neill
"Francis Jeffers is a disgusting, dirty little t**t." Sander Westerveld
"There will have to be a bubonic plague for me to pick Di Canio." Italy
coach Giovanni Trapattoni
"I'd like to be a dog. Dogs are nice. They can sleep any time, they wag
their tails and on top of that they can get stroked all the time." Emmanuel
Petit
"West Ham can take it or leave it. Our £15m bid for Rio Ferdinand already
constitutes a world record for a defender and is a measured valuation. 
There
will be no more." Leeds chairman Peter Ridsdale, less than a week after
upping his final offer by £3million
"I am a Nigerian and I will remain a Nigerian until the day I die." Kanu
"The Fat Wombats." Contestant on Australian version of Who Wants To Be A
Millionaire, asked to name Aussie women's soccer team The Matildas
"Against France we'll have to be at our best both technically, tactically
and spirit-wise." Kevin Keegan
"It was with a homosexual, I was barely 14 years old. But let's be fair, I
wasn't the only one who did it. He was a man in Bauru that all our team
visited." Pele on losing his virginity
"It was the first serious relationship I had after separating from my wife
Rose. Xuxa was 15, still a virgin and had a boyfriend who she fought with.
Xuxa's father gave me permission to go out with her. I didn't like virgins
so I told her to sort her 'problem' with her boyfriend. Then, after a 
little
while, we became 'friends' and started going out frequently." Pele again
"We gained more from the game than they did... except they got the points."
Brian Little
"I would not sign for another club, not even if I was offered 15 million
dollars. However, it would be different if they were to instead offer me 15
different women from all around the world. I would tell the club chairman:
'Please let me make these women happy - I will satisfy them like they have
never been satisfied before'." Sasa Curcic
"There is a world of difference between football and sex - no question 
about
that. I can't achieve an orgasm by looking at a team-mate, but it would be 
a
totally different matter with Cindy Crawford." Sasa Curcic
"Wendy Toms has never been taken from behind by a 14-stone centre half." 
Joe
Royle
"When he was dribbling, he used to go through a minefield with his arm, a
bit like you go through a supermarket." Bobby Robson on Gazza
"Argentina won't be at Euro 2000 because they're from South America." Kevin
Keegan
"I'm an emotional person and I enjoy crying. You know the film Beaches with
Bette Midler and Barbara Hershey? Sometimes, when I want a good cry I put 
it
on." Sensitive Ian Wright
"They should leave David Beckham alone - he's a great striker." Zoe Ball
"Argentina are the second best team in the world, and there's no higher
praise than that." Kevin Keegan
"Is Dreamcast the name of the team?" Prince Philip's reaction to seeing an
Arsenal shirt complete with sponsor's logo, during a trip to Highbury
"When he sees my boobs he likes to come out with the Austin Powers line
'Machine gun jubblies - how did I miss those?' He also goes: 'I put the 
grrr
in swingerrr. Yeah baby!'" Actress Emily Symons on boyfriend Matt Le 
Tissier

"Alessandro del Piero reminds me of Robert Rosario when I had him at
Coventry." Bobby Gould
"He's a water carrier, a hard worker, a bit of a dog... a ferret." David
Pleat on Didier Deschamps
"He used to play tapes of Bill Shankly talking. I remember that and a 
singer
he liked. I don't know who it was but it was crap. He played it on the team
bus too and all the boys hated it. Until one night it got chucked away. If
he's still wondering who threw that tape off the bus, it was me. So maybe 
he
was right and I'm not to be trusted." Gordon Strachan on Sir Alex Ferguson
"I now have a farm in Lanark. I've got two pygmy goats - Gin and Tonic."
Andy Goram
"If I were Marcello Lippi, people would have had more faith in me." John
Barnes
"Darlington will become the most successful club in England." George
Reynolds
"Working with people on a field turns me on." Graeme Souness
"I got the Shania Twain album for Christmas, but my new tip is Gabrielle.
I'm a bit of a weenybopper, really." Trevor Brooking
"I'm not going to look beyond the semi-final - but I would love to lead
Newcastle out at the final." Bobby Robson
"When I lived in rural Oxfordshire, I was walking home across a field when 
I
stroked a cow. The damn thing butted me in the orchestras." Mark Lawrenson
"I do go to football sometimes but I don't know the offside rule or
free-kicks - or side kicks - or whatever they're called." Victoria Beckham
"Real Madrid are like a rabbit dazed in the headlights of a car, except 
this
rabbit has a suit of armour, in the shape of two precious away goals." RTE
Commentator George Hamilton
"Welcome to the Nou Camp stadium in Barcelona that is packed to capacity...
with some patches of seats left empty." George Hamilton
"Dennis Wise, Vinnie Jones and John Fashanu must be turning in their
graves." Carlton Palmer
"I've seen some players with very big feet... and some with very small
feet." David Pleat
"David's most annoying habit is that he picks his toes with one of those
long prong things from Boots." Victoria Beckham
"If there's one thing Gus Uhlenbeek's got, it's pace and determination." 
Ray
Houghton
"When you're walking onto a bus and trying to get there before the person 
in
front of you, that's a different level of competition to playing in front 
of
80,000 people." Graeme Le Saux
"I've seen all the other Euro 2000 teams on video and no coach has as many
good players as I do." A pre-tournament Kevin Keegan
"I was inbred into the game by my father." David Pleat
"I'm not a person who goes into a deep depression after a defeat. I try to
remain reasonably upbeat. I'm realistic enough to know that results of
football matches are often unpredictable and, when all is said and done,
things don't always work out as one would wish!" Kevin Keegan, writing in
the England v Germany programme
"Zinedine Zidane could be a champion sumo wrestler. He can run like a crab
or a gazelle." Howard Wilkinson
"There's still 45 minutes to go - for both sides, I would guess." Brian
Marwood
"Players who have more great games than other players are the great
players." - Graeme Souness
"It should be a good match because they're a good football team as well and
we're a good football team. It should be a very good match." - Peter Taylor
"If Plan A fails, they could always revert to Plan A." Mark Lawrenson
"We started poorly, we finished poorly and we were poor in the middle. Even
when we were 1-0 up after five minutes I knew it was a disaster waiting to
happen." Bournemouth player/coach Peter Grant
"It's his first cap, so he's not got a lot of experience at this level."
Brian Marwood
"Unconsciously, I fell in love with the small round sphere with its amusing
and capricious rebounds which sometimes play with me." Fabien Barthez
"Achilles tendon injuries are a pain in the butt." David O'Leary
"I certainly wouldn't put money on myself. Working as a national manager is
out of the question." Sven-Goran Eriksson, six days before accepting the
England job
"If you'd been at school, he would have been the boy who ate worms." Neil
Ruddock on Stan Collymore
"I usually don't have sex. Not on the same day. I say no thanks. I guess
that, mentally, I want to keep the feeling in my feet and that's why. I
think the feeling sort of disappears out of your feet if you have sex
before. I have tried before and my feet felt like concrete when you are
supposed to kick the ball." Freddie Ljungberg
"Veggard Heggem, my word, he must have a Yamaha down his shorts." Terry
Butcher
"I was a bit anxious when I got to the stadium, but in all fairness if
hadn't been anxious I'd have been worried." Leeds' Paul Robinson
"I like the comfort of jeans, and the elegance of a suit. But above all, I
love the sensuality and sexuality that emanates from leather. It multiplies
one's sensations tenfold." Emmanuel Petit
"England are numerically outnumbered in the midfield." Mark Lawrenson
"It's real end-to-end stuff... but unfortunately it's all up at Forest's 
end." Chris Kamara
"We were in an awkward position against Yugoslavia, in that in order to win
we needed to score more goals then they did." Spanish coach Jose Antonio
Camacho
"The reason we went out of Euro 2000 wasn't anything to do with what
happened in the last minute against Romania." Gary Neville
"The fans might have envisaged a long string of away defeats strung 
together
like a pearl necklace but we have shown that will not be the case."
Manchester City chairman David Bernstein
"When we go out in the evening I like to go for it. I love the traditional
English gentleman look with cuff-links, highly-polished shoes and even a
money clip." David Seaman
"I have doubts about his mentality. I don't think he's a thousand percent
mentally." Eamonn Dunphy
"It was as if ... (long pause) ... the palm of Xavier's hand deflected the
ball away. And that's what I call hand ball." Garth Crooks
"This game is, I think, what my children would describe as 'pants'." Gary
Lineker
"I haven't got a clue about the exact number of women I had - four or five
maybe. But I regret it deeply." Kieron Dyer on his eventful holiday in Ayia
Napa
"I like to breed players that attack people." David O'Leary
"The Northampton striker went through the Stoke defence like a combine
harvester on summer holiday." Sky Sports' Brian Beard
"Don't get the idea I'm an Indian devotee but they taught their children 
how
to listen - they had to hear the wind, the trees and the earth talk. You 
can
hear the earth, you know." Former German coach-in-waiting Christoph Daum,
who later failed a drug test
"The players literally only have to fall out of their beds to be on the
training pitch." Dunfermline manager Jimmy Calderwood
"If you buy a man who is half-dead, everybody may be happy off the field,
but on the field you'll have major problems." Arsene Wenger
"It can't be Sunday every day. There are also Mondays and Tuesdays." George
Weah
"He walks around the kitchen going 'I'm a gay icon, they love me.' The 
thing is with David is that he doesn't care. He'll go out in his skirt and his
bandana and he doesn't care what people say." Victoria Beckham
"Northampton is a massive club." Goalkeeper Adam Sollitt

 

Index