TOP TEN THINGS MEN WOULD DO IF THEY WOKE UP AND HAD A VAGINA FOR A DAY:
   
   10.) IMMEDIATELY GO SHOPPING FOR ZUCCHINI AND CUCUMBERS.
 
   9.)  SQUAT OVER A HAND MIRROR FOR AND HOUR AND A HALF.
 
   8.) SEE IF THEY COULD FINALLY DO THE SPLITS.
 
   7.) SEE IF IT'S TRULY POSSIBLE TO LAUNCH A PING-PONG BALL 20 FEET.
 
   6.) CROSS THEIR LEGS WITHOUT REARRANGING THEIR CROTCH.
 
   5.) GET PICKED UP IN A BAR IN LESS THAN 10 MINUTES...
   (BEFORE CLOSING TIME)
 
   4.) HAVE CONSECUTIVE MULTIPLE ORGASMS AND STILL BE READY FOR MORE
   WITHOUT SLEEPING FIRST.
 
   3.) GO TO THE GYNECOLOGIST FOR A PELVIC EXAM AND ASK TO HAVE IT
   RECORDED ON VIDEO.
 
   2.) SIT ON THE EDGE OF THE BED AND PRAY FOR BREASTS, TOO.
 
   AND THE NUMBER ONE THING A MAN WOULD DO IS:
   1.) FINALLY FIND THAT DAMNED G-SPOT
 

   TOP TEN THINGS A WOMAN WOULD DO IF SHE WOKE UP WITH A PENIS FOR A DAY:
 
   10.) GET AHEAD FASTER IN CORPORATE AMERICA.
 
   9.) GET A BLOW JOB.
 
   8,) FIND OUT WHAT IS SO FASCINATING ABOUT BEATING THE MEAT.
 
   7.) PEE STANDING UP WHILE TALKING TO OTHER MEN AT THE URINAL.
 
   6.) DETERMINE WHY YOU CAN'T HIT THE BOWL CONSISTENTLY.
 
   5.) FIND OUT WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE ON THE OTHER END OF A SURGING ORGASM.
 
   4.) TOUCH/SHIFT YOURSELF IN PUBLIC WITHOUT THOUGHT AS TO HOW IMPROPER IT
       MAY BE TO OTHERS.
 
   3.) JUMP UP AND DOWN NAKED WITH AN ERECTION TO SEE IF IT FEELS AS 
       FUNNY AS IT LOOKS.
 
   2.) UNDERSTAND THE REASON FOR THE LIGHT REFRACTION THAT OCCURS BETWEEN A
   MAN'S EYES AND THE RULER SITUATED NEXT TO HIS MEMBER.
 
   AND THE NUMBER ONE THING A WOMAN WOULD DO IS:
   1.)REPEAT NUMBER 9.

 

Index