Ten Things That Would Have Been Different If The 12 Apostles Had Been Gay
   
1. The Last Supper would have been Brunch.
   
2. The beattitudes would start, "Fabulous are they.....".
   
3. Jesus' Triumphal Entry into Jerusalem would have been a full
production number with the faithful waiving ostrich feather palm
fronds and Jesus upon a large oyster shell not just a donkey.
   
4. The water at the wedding feast of Cana would not have been
changed to wine, but to extra dry Bombay Sapphire martinis with a touch of
Curacao for color.
   
5. The temple would not have been cleansed of money changers, just
redecorated.
   
6. Mary's hair would have been flawless.
   
7. The Gospels would be Matthew, Mark, Lance and Bruce.
   
8. Priests would have torrid affairs with altar boys......wait.
Never mind.
   
9. Jesus would never wear white after Labor Day.
   
10. The sermon on the Mount would have been a musical

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