Consumer Labels
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed by 
stupidity, here are some actual label instructions found on consumer goods:

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details
inside. 

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.

On a Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. 

On Tesco's tiramisu dessert (printed on the bottom of box): Do not turn
upside-down.

On Marks & Spencer bread pudding: Product will be hot after heating.

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body.

On Boot's children's cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate
machinery after taking this medication."

On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: May cause drowsiness.

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (

On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use. 

On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

On an American Airlines packet of peanuts: "Instructions:

Open packet, eat nuts."

On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you
to fly."

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