An Essex Girl walks into a chemist and asks  the assistant for some
bottom deodorant. The assistant, a little bemused, explains to the
woman that they don't sell bottom deodorant, and never have.

The Essex Girl, unfazed, assures the lady behind the counter that she has
been buying the stuff from here on a regular basis, and would like some
more.

The shop assistant thinks for a minute, knowing full well that they
don't stock, or have ever sold, such an item.
She smiles at the thick blonde pillock and says, "One moment please, I
will get the chemist."

The chemist looks at the Essex Girl and says, "Can I help you miss?"
"I would like to buy some bottom deodorant please," says the Essex Girl.
"I'm sorry," says the chemist, "we don't have  any."

"But I always get it here," says the Essex Girl.
"Do you have the container it comes in?"

"Yes!" Said the Essex Girl, "I'll go home and get it."

She returns with the container and hands it to the chemist who looks at
it and says to the her "This is just a normal stick of under arm
deodorant".

The annoyed Essex Girl snatches the container back and reads out loud from
the container, "To apply, push up bottom."

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