A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's
drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives
off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them, then
jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his
mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says "No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in
sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."
He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate, then
leaves.
 
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders
a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is
finishing his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar.
 
He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. Then the monkey
finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The
bartender is disgusted.
 
"Did you see what your monkey did now? He asks.
 
"No, what? "replies the guy.
 
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled it out,
and ate it!" said the bartender.
 
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything
in sight, but ever since he had to sh1t out that cue ball, he measures everything
first."

Last Index

Page Index