Alex Ferguson calls Beckham into his office. 

'David', he says, 'I need to talk to you about your performance against 
Leeds the other night, you were bloody hopeless, completely off form.' 

'Sorry boss', says David. 'I've not been myself lately.    I've got a few 
problems at home.' 

'Oh dear' says Fergie, 'What's up? Posh & the kids Ok?' 

'Oh, they're fine, it's just that something is really bugging me and i'm 
losing sleep and everything. I can't concentrate on 

my football and it's really messing me head up.' 

'Whatever's the matter?' says fergie 

'Well boss, It's pretty serious.    Victoria bought this jigsaw puzzle the 
other day and.........' 

'A JIGSAW??' shouts Sir Alex. 'You're playing Sh*t because of a jigsaw?' 

'Yeah boss, but you don't understand, it's really doing me head in!' says 
David, 'It's really hard, it's this picture of a Tiger and it looks really 
easy on the box and I'm sure i've got all the bits and everything but I 
just 
can't get it right and it's doing my head in and, and.........' 

'David, David, David' says Fergie, 'You better get a grip son and quick.' 

'Ok boss, but.............It's this picture of a Tiger and it looks really 
easy on the box and i'm sure i've got all the bits and everything but I can 
t do it and it's doing my head in and....... and....it's a Tiger and it 
looks easy but it's really hardand er, it's a Tiger and everything, er... 
on 
the box... er..... sorry boss.' 

'Ok, Ok' says Sir Alex, 'bring in the blo*dy jigsaw and let's have a look 
shall we. It can't be that difficult'. 

'Thanks boss.' says David. 

So Becks brings in the jigsaw and takes it to Fergies office. 

'Here it is boss' he says, showing Ferguson the picture on the box, look 
boss, it's a Tiger right, and it's a really   good  picture and everything 
but I just can't do it and it's really hard and it's doing my head in and 
everything..' 

Becks empties all the pieces from the box all over Fergie's desk. 

Sir Alex looks at whats on the desk, looks up with his head in his hands 
and 
says to Beckham........... ! 

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! 

'Put the *@!>?& Frosties back in the box David'............. 

Index