Make sure you put your best Irish accent on when reading this: 


Two Irishmen in London whilst looking for work, were strolling down 
Oxford Street.  After walking for a few minutes, Paddy turns to Murphy 
with a look of amazement on his face and says: "Murphy, will you have 
a look at that shop over there.  I thought that London was supposed to 
be expensive but that shop is as cheap as chips!!" 

Murphy says: "Paddy you're right so you are, will you have a look at 
that.  Suits £10.00, Shirts £4.00, Trousers £5.00.  I think that we should buy
the lot and take them back to Ireland.  We would make a tidy 
profit selling them in Dublin so we would." 

Paddy says in agreement: "Murphy that is as good an idea as you'll ever 
have, but I'm pretty sure that you have to pay taxes and duty on things 
like that.  The shopkeeper will never let us have them if he thinks that 
we're gonna export them and make our fortune, so he won't.". 

Murphy thinks  and says: "Paddy, I've got idea! You can do the best 
English accent out of the pair of us.  You go in there and do the talking and
I'll just stand behind you and say nothing.  He'll never guess we're Irish so he
won't." 

OK Murphy", agrees Paddy, "I'll do the talking, you just stand there and 
look English." 

So the two visitors to our illustrious capital city go into the shop, 
where Paddy is greeted politely by the owner.  Paddy then proceeds to do 
his best Phil Mitchell impression; 

"Awwwight Guvnor, I'll 'ave 20 of yer 'Whistle 'un Flutes', 20 'Dickie 
Dirts' and 20 pairs of strides.  And if yer don't mind I'll be paying 
with the 380 'Pictures of the Queen' in my 'Sky Rocket'." 

Upon hearing this request from Paddy, the owner smiles, takes a look at 
Murphy as well then asks Paddy "You're Irish aren't you?" 

Quite bemused, Paddy replies, "Oh be'Jasus. Mary mother of Christ, if 
that isn't me best English accent.  How in God's name did you know that 
we were Irish" 

The Owner replies. "This is a Dry Cleaners  mate". 

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